A Few Notes on SHERLOCK HOLMES (2009)

Posted by Daniel Metz

Christmas time in New England for my family means a lot of things. My mother and my grandmother fighting over the matriarchy with subtle jabs at who will get up to warm up the food. Brother Benjamin excitedly begging to open the present before the traditional breakfast. But the most important Christmas tradition is when we go out to the local multiplex and see a movie that none of us really want to see.

Last year was the first ever respite from that tradition, when I somehow convinced my family to see The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. They got revenge in 2009 with our trip to Sherlock Holmes, the new action/adventure film about the old homosexual detective. Oops. I wasn’t supposed to say that.

The film is a fine example of the genre, a genre that I have no appetite for. It is probably better than most, as Holmes’ mind and wit is superior to that of, say, Dr. Robert Langdon of The Da Vinci Code. Nevertheless, the film breaks down in these moments of explosions and battles that utilize quick cutting, rapid camera movement/handheld camera, and generally employ techniques of disorientation. I am not really that interested nor impressed with that overused directing style.

Hey, you guys, we're in the middle of an action sequence here!

As Stephen so eloquently put it, the film is saved by the chemistry between Holmes and Watson. Read his review. All I can say is that their scenes are not frequent or long enough, and Watson needs more screen time in general.

The biggest disappointment of the film came in Rachel “ugliest name in Hollywood” McAdam’s performance as Holmes’ love interest. Do not get me wrong, she was charming and beautiful as the professional criminal with a soft spot for homosexual detectives. My beef, as you will, is with the advertising of the film. In the trailers she is prancing around in a very sexy corset-lingerie dealie.

Probably a body double here, but I don't mind.

When I saw the trailer, I thought to myself, “if she is in that outfit in every scene, I will like this movie.” You may find that superficial, but, well, that’s what the cinema is about so tough cookies. Anyway, I get to the multiplex and what do I find? Not one fucking scene with that corset! It was all for the ads. I am officially announcing a boycott on that girl’s films.